Happy Birthday MM

We're at Callaway Gardens celebrating both Christmas and MM's birthday. Amanda's mom (mommy's mommy, or MM) gave us a trip to Callaway for Christmas while the Bunkers were "down South". We were fortunate that it coincided with MM's birthday, so we were able to celebrate it with all her children and grandchildren in attendance. After this we went to the Fanntasy in Lights, which was a fantasy indeed.

Merry Christmas

Christmas is such a paradoxical time of year. On one hand, our hearts open towards complete strangers as we donate large amounts of food, clothing, and toys to make Christmas brighter for those who can't afford even the basic necessities.. On the other hand, our fists clench towards complete strangers as we fight the traffic and crowds to buy yet another present; perhaps even one where we didn't even spend the time to think of ourselves. You know, Christ (the guy we named the holiday after) talked about both sides of that paradox- he encouraged the first and warned against the second.

Tell me- which makes you happier?

The Mt. Paran First Grade classes put on a musical tonight. Emily was fortunate enough to be one of the "Three Little Maids" (of Mikado fame). There were also the Three Billy Goats Gruff (Piper was one), Three Blind Mice (Brooke was one), Three Caballeros, Three Musketeers, Three Men in a Tub, Three Little Pigs, and Three (wait - just two!) Bears. The plotline is that Baby Bear has gone missing and all the characters are trying to find her. It was a very cute musical and all the kids had fun.

Today is my first day back at work, so I finally have a chance to breathe. Being Mr. Mom was no easy feat for a person who sits at a desk all day! Shuttling the kids around, getting people fed (except Claire, of course), and trying to keep the house just across the line from "a shambles" keeps you moving. In fact, I lost four pounds!

Everyone at home is doing great! Claire is coming along nicely. She is so considerate of her parents, even sleeping at night in four hour stretches and rarely fussing between feedings. Emily & Alex love having a baby sister, and Emily is learning how to be a big help - she's even learning how to carry the baby! How's that for being grown up? And Amanda is healing nicely. I am helping out as much as I can to make the transition back to "full-time mom" as painless as possible.

Claire's M.M. (mommy's mommy) stopped by to see Claire today. M.M. just had back surgery, so this was quite a trek for her. But she's doing much better and *loved* seeing her newest grandchild. (And Claire did pretty good, too, despite what the picture shows.)

Claire's first full day in the world is going great. She's met some of her relatives and spent a good amount of time with her brother, sister, daddy, and of course, mommy. She had a little problem with scratching her face up, but we think we've talked her out of any more of that. 

Welcome to the family, Claire! Emily and Alex have already taken to you- like you are their sister or something! Once again God shows that he knows what he is doing! 

SHE'S HERE!

Claire Elizabeth Finch was born at 3:53 PM today!
8 lbs. 1 oz.
19-3/4 in.

Mother and baby are both doing fine.

Happy Thanksgiving!

$100 laptops!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Emily lost her sixth tooth. 

Greeting From Transylvania

It's Halloween weekend! It's also just after Samantha's birthday, so Duff and Beck are throwing a party. They've haunted-up their garage and invited all the neighbors over for a chance to wet their pants.

And there was much rejoicing (yayyyy....)

EagleFest 2005

This was the weekend at Mt. Paran when we celebrate! EagleFest is full of games, food, performances (including Emily and the 1st graders), and seeing friends. Because Amanda is in her eighth month, we were only there for about 2-1/2 hours, but the kids had a blast. Parking is atrocious, though. It gets worse every year...

Alex Without the Patch

Alex's doctor says he can start wearing the patch only half the day now!

Emily does her project

September is Animal Month in Mrs. Nelson's 1st grde class. Emily is finishing up her project on Cheetahs by typing up her fact sheet. It can be slow going but is rewarding in the end- she'll have an easy-to-read assignment containing all of her thoughts, ready to give her first presentation. Oh, did I not mention that? The project ends with an oral report to the class!

MAYONNAISE JAR and TWO BEERS

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the liquid into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family, children, health, friends, and favourite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will
never have room for the things that are important to you."

"So... pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple beers with a friend."

The Horror of Blimps

by Scylla

Last week while travelling I stopped at a Zany Brainy store and saw that they had a blimp for sale. It's called Airship Earth, and it's a great big balloon with a map of the Earth on it, and two propellors hanging from the bottom. You blow up the balloon with helium put batteries in it, and you have a radio controll indoor blimp.

I'd seen these things for sale in Sharper Image catalogs for $60-$75. At Zany Brainy it was on clearance for $15. What a deal!

Last night my wife was playing tennis and it was just my daughter and I at home. I bought a small helium tank from a party store, and last night we put the blimp together.

Let me tell you, it's quite a blimp. It's huge. The balloon has like a 3 ft diameter.

We blew it up with the tank attached the gondola with the propellors, and put in batteries.

Then we balanced the blimp for neutral bouyancy with this putty that came with it, so it hangs in the air by itself neither rising nor falling.

It was easy and fun, and then I blew up another balloon and made Mickey Mouse helium voices for my daughter.

My three year old girl loved it. We flew the blimp all over the house, terrorized the dog, attacked the fish tank, and the controls were so easy my daughter could fly.

Let's face it, blimps are fun.

Alas, the fun had to end and my daughter had to go to sleep. I left the blimp floating in my office downstairs, my wife came home, and we went to bed, and slept the sleep of the righteous.

At this point it is important to know that my house has central heating. I have it configured to blow hot air out on the ground floor and take it in at the second floor to take advantage of the fact that heat rises.

The blimp which was up until this moment a fun toy here embarked on a career of evil. Using the artificial convection of my central heating, the blimp stealthily departed my office. It moved silently through the living and drifted to the staircase. Gliding wraithlike over the staircase it then entered the bedroom where my wife and I lay sleeping peacefully.

Running silently, and gliding six feet or so above the ground on invisible and tiny air currects it approached the bed.

In spite of it's noiseless passage, or perhaps because of it, I awoke. That doesn't really say it properly. Let me try again.

I awoke, the way you awake at 2:00 AM when your sleeping senses suddenly tell you without reason that the forces of evil on converging on you.

That still doesn't do it. Let me try one more time.

I awoke the way you awake when you suddenly know that there is a large levitating sinister presence hovering towards you with menacing intent through the maligant darkness.

Now sometimes I do wake up in the middle of the night thinking that there are large sinister and menacing things floating out of the darkness to do me and mine evil. Usually I open my eyes, look and listen carefully, decide it was a false alarm, and go back to sleep.

So, the fact that I awoke in such a manner was not all that unusual.

On this occasion I awoke to the sense that there was a large menacing presence approaching me silently out of the gloom, so I opened my eyes, and there it was! A LARGE SILENT MENACING PRESENCE WAS APPROACHING ME OUT OF THE GLOOM, AND IT COULD FLY!!!

Somewhere in the control room of my mind a fat little dwarf in a security outfit was paging through a Penthouse while smoking a cigar with his feet up on the table, watching the security monitors of my brain with his peripheral vision. Suddenly he saw the LARGE SILENT SINSITER MENACING FLOATING PRESENCE coming at me, and he pulled every panic switch and hit every alarm that my body has. A full decade's allotment of adrenaline was dumped into my bloodstream all at once. My metabolism went from "restful sleep mode" to HOLY SHIT! FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE OR DIE!!!! mode" in a nanosecond. My heart went from twenty something beats per minute to about 240 even faster.

I always knew this was going to happen. I always knew that skepticism and science were mere psychological decorations and vanities. Deep in our alligator brains we all know that the world is just chock full of evil and monsters and sinister forces aligned against us, and it is only a matter of time until they show up. Evolution know this, too. It knows what to do when the silent terror comes at you from out of the dark.

When 50 million years worth of evolutionary survival instinct hits you all at once flat in the gut at 200 mph it is not a pleasant sensation.

Without volition I screamed my battle cry (which is indistinguishable to the sound a little girl makes when you drop a spider down her dress (not that I'd know what that sounds like,) and lept out of bed in my underwear.

I struck the approaching menace with all my strength and almost fell over at the total lack of resistance that a helium balloon offers when you punch the living shit out of it with all the stength that sudden middle of the night terror produces.

It's trajectory took it straight into the ceiling fan which whipped it about the room at terrifying velocity.

Seeking a weapon, I ripped the alarm clock out of its plug and hurled it at the now High Velocity Menacing presence (breaking the clock and putting a nice hole in the wall.)

Somehow at this moment I suddenly realized that I was fighting the blimp, and not a monster. It might have been funny if I didn't truly and actually feel like I was having a legitimate heart-attack.

On quivering legs I went to the bathroom and literally gagged into the toilet while shaking uncontrollably with the shock of the reaction I'd had.

Unbelievably, both my wife and daughter had completely slept through the incident. When I decided that I wasn't having a heart attack after all I went back into the bedroom and found the blimp which had somehow survived the incident.

I took it to the walk in closet and released it inside where it floated around with the air currents released from the vents in there. I closed the door, this sealing it in, and went back to bed. About 500 years later I fell asleep.

***

At about 7 am my wife awoke. She had been playing tennis and wasn't aware that we have assembled the blimp the previous evening, and that is was now floating around the the walk-in closet that she approached.

The dynamic between the existing air currents of the closet and the suction caused by opening the door was just enough to give the blimp the appearance of an Evil Sinister Menace flying straight towards her.

This time the blimp did not survive the encounter, nor almost, did I, as I had to explain to my very angry spouse what motivated me to hide an evil lurking presence in the closet for her to find at 7 am.

I can order replacement balloons on the internet but I don't think I will.

Some blimps are better off dead.

20 Things we have learned from the movies

1. During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip joint at least once.


2. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets which reach up to armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.


3. It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.


4. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.


5. Large loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not.


6. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.


7. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.


8. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.


9. If you decide to start dancing in the street everyone you bump into will know all the steps.


10. Should you decide to defuse a bomb don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.


11. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.


12. Extremely beautiful and intelligent women are likely to become prostitutes or welders.


13. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.


14. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.


15. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned to a partner who is their total opposite.


16. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.


17. Radiation causes interesting mutations - not to your future children but to you, right there and then.


18. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.


19. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.


20. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man eating sharks which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

Global Rich List
Feeling poor? Follow the link to find the antidote.

People get so caught up comparing themselves to the people immediately around them that they forget the incredible disparity between 1st and 3rd world countries. They always believe that they need this or that without giving thought to what the word "need" really means. People bold all kinds of things, but the list of things they need is actually quite short. Animals survived for millions of years without the modern amenities (thousands if you are a Creationist), so you can probably do without that big screen TV. At least for a little while...

African Food Crisis
Stop here to read about the lives of some of the poorest people in the world. And you thought you had problems...

Fun @ Chucky Cheese's

We were planning to go to American Adventure, but guess what? This is the week they start closing down! We found that it is no longer open on the weekdays, so we went to the backup plan - time with the rat. The kids, of course, were thrilled. And I must admit, it is cheaper than AmerAdvent! :)

E&A Hear the Baby

Here we are waiting to hear the baby's heartbeat. Emily and Alex are both excited, both to hear the heartbeat and just to be at the doctor's office. The baby is already real to them - Amanda is definitely showing, and Emily has felt the baby kick - but I imagine hearing the baby will really bring it home.

Bored on the Phone? Beware Jerk-O-Meter - Yahoo! News
I can't wait for this to be common place on all phones! Maybe a little feedback will help some of my coworkers learn to control themselves!

And maybe, in those rare instances, it will help me, too! :)

Fun in Wisconsin Redux

Fun in Wisconsin

E&A and their cousins have had so much fun this week. Gamecube, swimming, walking the dog, getting ice cream - who wouldn't enjoy that kind of vacation? Tomorrow we head home, but we'll have lots of good memories in tow.

Greetings from Lake Geneva

Gymnastics Camp

This week was Gymnastic Camp. Emily was "Wet 'n' Wild" and Alex was a Pirate. They both loved it. Amanda and I didn't get to go.

World Year of Physics 2005
Did you know that Einstein was smart? It's true! So much so that that "Annus Mirabilis" is being celebrated this year. So, you owe it to yourself and all of posterity to read each of the papers published by Einstein in 1905.

Just kidding...

But if you want to know more...

Humor
Scroll to the bottom - the Klingon Software Developers are a hoot!

Emily's mole has been removed. She was very brave - there was only one time when she was upset, and that was right near the start. Once she realized it wasn't going to hurt, she did great.

She has five stitches which will be removed in two weeks. And no pool until at least Tuesday! Oh, the humanity!

Summer is here! The pool is open and the kids are clamoring to go, even when it's cool or rainy or, well, even at night! The kids have so much fun at the pool. We are so blessed that Emily & Alex play so well together! 

The Oops List
Lots of pictures, some of them photo-shopped. Funny nonetheless.

Tiny robot helicopter unveiled in Japan

You've seen it in movies and on TV - but then, it was just science fiction. Introducing the little flying robots that are just born to spy on you! Can you imagine what will be possible with these things when they hit production capability? They can be used for surveillance, or security monitoring, or physical delivery of extremely small packages (think "21st century carrier pidgeon").

CNN.com - NASA: Voyager I enters solar system's final frontier - May 25, 2005
"Barring hardware failure, Voyager I and II boast enough power and communications capability to keep radioing back to Earth until 2020, NASA says."

It's astounding what we were able to accomplish in the 1970's. We think of that time as "before personal computers", where handheld calculators had all of four or five functions, and "Pong" was the great hit of entertainment. Yet, at that time, we were launching probes into space that are continuing to work to this day.

The only other NASA achievements that have worked this well are the Martian rovers and the Martian mapping satellite. And it took a lotta tries before we got that right...

Have I told you that Alex is wearing an eye patch now? It seems his left eye is a bit weak, so he covers his right eye for 12 hrs a day. Once it starts to get better it'll drop down to 8 - but he'll still be wearing the glasses! Boy, they sure do change the way he looks!
 

And Emily lost one of her top two teeth. Since she had the wide gap between her teeth before this, the missing tooth plus the gap make her look like a hockey player! 

NASA science reveals texts of Trojan Wars, early gospels
This is the kind of thing we all hope for - finding a gem in a load of garbage. Multispectral imaging, as enhanced by computers, allows us to bring out the details of obscured writings to a point that we are able to translate them. This will be big - very big. As this article describes, they've only translated 1% of this find before now, but the new technology will speed up the process.

My favorite part:

Meanwhile, the Oxford team is looking at another promising application of the technology. Scholars have long known that the elaborately painted cartonnage used to encase mummies was a kind of papier-mache made from papyrus. A lot of the papyrus has writing on it, but there didn't seem to be a way of reading it without destroying the decorative cartonnage.

In one recent trial, the imaging process was able to read writing beneath the painted surface of a cartonnage fragment. Scholars were thrilled, even though it turned out to be just another government report.

The Darth Side: Memoirs of a Monster
A hoot! Be sure to read the archives for the full effect of the Dark Lord.

Astrologer to sue Nasa
I should have thought of this. I need a quick way to retire - why not sue the government for the damage it's doing to other planets? How about I sue them for littering on Mars? I believe it's a $500 fine per instance!

Toyota.com : Vehicles : Prius
(See the fourth picture from the left).

I bought a Prius - Silver, Package #6, Leather interior.

And boy is it fun!

WSJ.com - Eyes on the Road
GM still seems to miss the point that hybrids aren't just a flash in the pan, but are a good stopgap measure while we travel toward hydrogen fuel cell vehicles.

A Plan for Spam

A great writeup by Paul Graham about what spam is and how to stop it.

SpamBayes: Bayesian anti-spam classifier written in Python.

A great Outlook plug-in that learns what your good mail looks like and moves all the spam "out of the way". So far, it has worked great for me!

The Alliance to Save Energy says Americans driving SUVs paid $180 more for gas in 2004 than they did in 2003, passenger car drivers paid $144 more, and hybrid electric car drivers paid only $50 to $67 more.

New American Dream points out that bicyclists' gas costs were the exact same in 2004 as in 2003!

http://www.newdream.org/bike/

Saturn Today - Your Daily Source of Saturn News Brought to you by SpaceRef
It's amazing what we are capable of, technologically. We have robots on Mars and a surveyor satellite orbiting same, as well as a surveyor satellite orbiting Saturn. And Now, we have a probe on Titan taking color pictures and listening to sounds. That's right, sounds from another planet!

Now, if we could only put aluminum foil in the microwave...